This reminded me of Tagore's 'somoy karo je nai, ora chole ole dole, gaan hay dube jay kon kolahole//
Time receives an elobarate treatment in the hands of Classical poets too; yet Sarathi's treament is a bit obtruse. The creator talks about the endangered species who's lost in labyrinth of time; involves the readers with his queries--ektu somoy hobe, ektu somoy, and many more; his analogies- farming and cloning are very interesting; the reader realizes the pathos of human existence in modern times. It ends with an optimistic note where the poet's dreams of re-creating time. Some of the modifications, I'd suggest:
1.ektu somoy hobe, ektu somoy/somoy toirir ekta jontro banale kemon hoy needed a punctuation for dramatic effect.
2.boddo dami bodhoy, othoba dusprapyo, admixture of colloquial n elite language.
3.sobai sobai-ke chaile somoy dite parbe abar ager moto. Try to reconstruct its syntax.
Good wishes with your creations but don't torture me again! :P
ajkal sobai baro bastyo amra hate etotuku somoy nei meeting r kajer chape biponno... okaron kichhu fanka kothar buli r aprojoniyo kichhu kajer bhire biparjosto onyo ke okaron somoy r meki hasi upohar diye cholechhi protiniyoto ghore fire dekhi mithye kothar mukhoser arale asol mukh kete khotobikkhoto
2 comments:
This reminded me of Tagore's 'somoy karo je nai, ora chole ole dole,
gaan hay dube jay kon kolahole//
Time receives an elobarate treatment in the hands of Classical poets too; yet Sarathi's treament is a bit obtruse. The creator talks about the endangered species who's lost in labyrinth of time; involves the readers with his queries--ektu somoy hobe, ektu somoy, and many more;
his analogies- farming and cloning are very interesting; the reader realizes the pathos of human existence in modern times. It ends with an optimistic note where the poet's dreams of re-creating time.
Some of the modifications, I'd suggest:
1.ektu somoy hobe, ektu somoy/somoy toirir ekta jontro banale kemon hoy needed a punctuation for dramatic effect.
2.boddo dami bodhoy, othoba dusprapyo, admixture of colloquial n elite language.
3.sobai sobai-ke chaile
somoy dite parbe
abar ager moto. Try to reconstruct its syntax.
Good wishes with your creations but don't torture me again! :P
ajkal sobai baro bastyo amra
hate etotuku somoy nei
meeting r kajer chape biponno...
okaron kichhu fanka kothar buli
r aprojoniyo kichhu kajer bhire biparjosto
onyo ke okaron somoy r meki hasi
upohar diye cholechhi protiniyoto
ghore fire dekhi
mithye kothar mukhoser arale
asol mukh kete khotobikkhoto
Post a Comment